Who’s been a good girl? Who hasn’t chased anyone in a few days, hasn’t knocked anything over, hasn’t broken anything, caused trouble, gotten into any fights, basically has been an extra good cat? C’mon, raise a paw if you’ve been good.
No one gets past me, Guardian Pia of the Top of the Stairs. No one. None shall pass and all that. I take my job very seriously and nobody is getting past me.
Who cares about the bottom of the stairs? The top of the stairs is what’s important. That’s what needs to be guarded. That’s the important job. And who are you calling Floofy? This isn’t floof. This is intimidation!
Important? Doesn’t she know it’s the bottom that’s important? Without the bottom, there is no top. Therefore, and I repeat, I am Guardian of the Bottom of the Stairs and no one gets past me. Has too much kibble gone to her head, or what?