Now that I’m back to enjoying the entire house again after a slight hiatus
in which my nickname became Ms. Pee Queen, I’ve found my muscles aren’t as flexible as they used to be. In resuming all this traipsing up and down the stairs, leaping onto tables and countertops, scrambling out of Patrol Sergeant Zuzu’s sight, and figuring out how to open the refrigerator (or at the very least, the treat cupboard), I somewhat begrudgingly decided to try morning yoga to help stretch my limbs for my active day ahead.
This is my Downward Staring at Toy Whilst Ignoring TV Remote Pose. This is harder than it might look. Given how much I’ve come to love watching the AMC channel for its quirky shows and classic, uncut movies, I’d suggest this pose only for the most highly advanced yoga participants.
My Sideways Snide Look with Tongue Exposed Pose is one I highly recommend for households containing “I’m Better Than You” siblings. You wouldn’t believe how often I’ve used this pose. An intermediate position, you’ll need to build up those tongue muscles before putting into play, and once you do, let ‘er rip at whomever, moms and dads included. They’ll be proud of you!
Mom: Your what pose? You’re telling our friends to practice sticking their tongues out at their moms and dads??
“It’s a yoga thing, mom. Somewhat controversial in some circles, but proven to be very beneficial. I wouldn’t expect you to understand. So don’t worry your pretty little head.”
*whispers* This is my Staring At You Pose, the one I perfected at ten weeks old. It’s a slight deviation from the I’m Terribly Cute and You’re Feeling All Melty Pose. This is considered a safe position and usually defuses any questionable questions. It’s also quite comfortable…
… which is a good thing because she’ll be leaving any minute now …um, any minute. If your mom or dad doesn’t leave or *shudders* has more questions, just hold the Staring At You Pose. Hold it for as long as it takes…
Well, that was fun. No need to tell you how long mom stood there as if waiting for me to answer her question. And while I could have remained in position for as long as it took, days perhaps, my muscles were ready for action so I decided to move into my tried and true I’m Ignoring You position with the added bonus of my trademark criss-cross paws. And that gets them every time.